Showing posts with label Life as a writer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life as a writer. Show all posts

21 Precepts of the Samurai - something to live by.

>> Sunday, March 21, 2010

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I came across the Budo Sai (21 Precepts of a Samurai) a few months back and I find them somewhat enlightening.


The 21 Precepts of the Samurai are:



  1. Know Yourself (Jikoo o shiru koto),

  2. Always follow through on commitments (Jibun no kimeta koto wa saigo made kikko suru koto),

  3. Respect everyone (Ikanaru hito demo sonke suru koto),

  4. Hold strong convictions that cannot be altered by your circumstances (Kankyo ni sayu sarenai tsuyoi shinnen o motsu koto),

  5. Don't make an enemy of yourself (Mizu kara teki o tsukuranai koto),

  6. Live without regrets (Koto ni oite kokaisezu),

  7. Be certain to make a good first impression (Hito to no deai o taisetsu ni suru koto),

  8. Don't cling to the past (Miren o motanai koto),

  9. Never break a promise (Yakusoku o yaburanai koto),

  10. Don't depend on other people (Hito no tayoranai koto),

  11. Don't speak ill of others (Hito o onshitsu shinai koto),

  12. Don't be afraid of anything (Ikanaku koto ni oite mo osorenai koto),

  13. Respect the opinions of others (Hito no iken o soncho suru koto),

  14. Have compassion and understanding for everyone (Hito ni taishite omoiyari o motsu koto),

  15. Don't be impetous (Karuhazumi ni koto o okosanai koto),

  16. Even little things must be attended to (Chiisa na koto demo taisetsu ni suru koto),

  17. Never forget to be appreciative (Kansha no kimochi o wasurenai koto),

  18. Be first to seize opportunity (Hito yori sossenshi kodo suru koto),

  19. Make a desperate effort (Issho kenmai monogoto o suru koto),

  20. Have a plan for your life (Jinsei no mokuhyo o sadameru koto),

  21. Never lose your "Beginner Spirit" (Shoshin o wasurubekarazaru koto)


I some-what am embarass that I fail in some of the obvious things for living life and I can hear the doom-sayers saying, "Easy said but you fall short."


But, as Precept 1 ask of us to Know Yourself, the process of knowing oneself is always a walk into the valley of darkness. For one may learn more by standing in the dark then when in the light.


Can I ever live up to the ideals stated in these 21 precepts? Some I can and some I may never attain. But a start is a start and better than those that do not start at all.


Others may ask me, does this compromise your religious stands? These are precepts, as much as the Chinese are called to be filial and respect their parents, which is one of the central teachings of Confucius in The Analects of Confucius or Lun Yu (Chapter 1 verse 2,6,7 & Chapter 2); yet readily accepted by the Chinese regardless of religion. Precepts are sayings or guides for living life, often times universal ideals that transcend religion.


What other precepts that you know of that form universal ideals every man/woman can live by?




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To Those That Don't Understand, It's Spelt 'DEPRESSION'

>> Tuesday, March 9, 2010

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"Let it go." "Get over it." "Move on with life." "I don't like the change in you." "Just think happy thoughts."


I've heard my fair share of comments. The comments are fair and spoken from well-intended motives. The people are sincere and trying their best to nudge me along.


But they got it all wrong.


I often dismissed this form of positive-emphaty as being the inability of the commenter to understand the true nature of the condition that has gripped me. For in all fairness, only those who suffer would know how it truly feels.


It's spelt DEPRESSION and here are some points a care-giver should know:




  1. Understand the condition and then the person. It is a condition the sufferer may not fully comprehend themselves (I sure did not) and in most cases, they do not know why they are in the condition they are in. So do your homework. Study the condition and use that knowledge as a platform for reaching out.






  2. Stress. Stress plays a key role in the on-set of a depressive spiral. We all face stress in some measure through out our lives. Unfortunately, the sufferer has lost or lack the mechanism to handle stress. DO NOT add to the stress they are already facing. Stress could come in the form of a simple question such as, "Why are you feeling this way?" Yes, finding the answer to why is stressful. DO NOT push them over-the-edge by unnecessary questions and fact-finding activities.



  3. Trauma. An overwhelming blast of stress causes trauma and this broke the brains natural ability to cope and thus begins the onset of depression. Studies have shown that exposure to a traumatic experience in early child-hood makes the brain hypersensitive to stress which contributes to the onset of depression in adults. Understanding the traumatic experience in the life of the sufferer will help. In some cases, it was a series of traumatic and stressfull incidences that hit the individual at the same time that caused the depressive spiral.



  4. Personality Change. Understand that once depression has set in, the person's personality and character has change. They will not be the same person, you once knew. Why? The body compensates and adapts itself to the new condition. The body is trying its best to cope. These changes are in itself, confusing to the sufferer. Don't stress them out by pointing out the change, instead accept it and allow the sufferer the space to reconfigure themselves to their new state. In some cases, the changes do not stick and the sufferer reverts back but in some, these changes are permanent.



  5. Walk with us. I cannot emphasis more on the importance of this point. Walk with the sufferer. Don't merely say, "I understand." but instead add, "We'll walk through this together." There is a deep sense of hopelessness and loneliness in the sufferer. Leaving them alone or on their own enforces this prevalent feelings. Most sufferers commit suicide, not because they are stupid or attention-seeking, but rather because they want the pain to end. If you are sincere and genuine, walk the talk. Don't just say you want to help but be the help. If a care-giver does not owe up to what they say, it would merely push the sense of hopelessness and loneliness deeper into the sufferer's psyche. Walk with us, show us that someone cares and trust me; change can happen.



  6. Antidepressants. I am NOT an advocate of this form of treatment. Why? To me, it merely mask the condition. It represses the condition into a dormant state and really doesn't help the sufferer. In all the readings, I've read; I've come to the conclusion that antidepressants do not cure the condition. It merely brings it down to a manageable state. Problem with that is, without the antidepressants, the condition may return with a vengence.



Once broken, can this be fixed?


I am incline to say, NO.


The scars are buried deep in the psyche and mind. The brain has changed and this is not something that can be fixed that easily. Yet, there is hope. The brain is a wonderfully flexible organ and it can re-wire itself to work-round the handicap. A sufferer can start these processes along but they cannot do it on their own. They need care-givers around them to help them along, until the brain has rewired itself, well enough for the sufferer to manage on their own.


This is a plea for all to understand because only through understanding can one help to beat down this condition. For sufferers, I know it's hard but we too need to understand as best as possible what we suffer from.


Sun Tzu wrote, " It is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles; if you do not know your enemies but do know yourself, you will win one and lose one; if you do not know your enemies nor yourself, you will be imperiled in every single battle."


Understand this condition called DEPRESSION, understand yourself and we can win this battle.




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There's a story in every moment

>> Tuesday, February 16, 2010

You can sit on a plane or at a (boring) meeting and there may be a story lying in wait. All you have to do is turn, smile and talk to those around you. Every one has a story, has a phrase that sticks, has a tale to tell and places they've been. All you need to do is turn, smile and start talking. Do not be afraid to strike up a conversation with the ones near you. And above all, after asking, listen to what they have to tell and take note. You never know when that phrase would seem appropriate when you are writing conversation or laying down a plot.


There's a story in every moment.


Too many times we try too hard to fomulate a great story. We labour over ideas that HAVE to be spectacular, mind blowing and out of this world. We fashion large words and create outlandish worlds to plant our single dimensional characters.


But stop and talk to those you meet on the bus or a plane or sitting at a coffee shop and you'll gain a wealth of stories. Real stories with real people, living real lives with real problems and moving in real time. You then take on the role of scribe and thus, chronicle the lives of everyday people. It doesn't have to be outlandish or spectacular, just honest and true.


Try it. talk to someone and listen to the story, yet untold.

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Talent is crucial to good writing...sorry PERFECT writing.

I've met a lot of people who have express their desires to write. Their eyes light up when I tell them I write in my spare time, have a book out and regularly get my articles published on online newspapers and political opinionated websites in Malaysia. Glossy eye and spunky about the idea that people would read their writings they pursue the road I took. But not all roads are meant to be travelled by a bandwagon of wannabe writers.


My path to writing is unique to me. For everyday I spend writing, I had several years of practice. I did not get here by mere chance. I had to sweat it out and develop my own style and voice. I took to blogging in 2003 to better my writing skills. I needed to learn how to connect with an audience, write in words that inspire and move people and what better way than through blogging. From there I joined a writing group and practiced my writing there. I've written a short play and it was produced during my college days, written some really bad songs that are only worthy for my shower, poetry has been a dabble of mine since school days and only in the last two years have I seriously written short stories and full length features.


It took time and that is something all writers (good writers) have to go through. It takes time to polish one's skills. There's no shortcuts to being a good writer but if you want to be a PERFECT writer than you need Talent.


Let me say this over and over again. You need Talent to begin with. Some have it, some may not and this means not everyone is cut out to be a writer. Yes, you may have good writing skills but are you a storyteller? Can you capture the attention of an audience?


I learnt the traits of capturing the attention of the audience in my college days when I was part of the theatre group. I took to the stage and was a natural at it. From there I move on to writing for stage and essentially that's where I learnt my strong point when it comes to writing stories - dialogue. The scene plays in my head like a play and I'm the omnipresent observer jotting down the details that I see. That's my Talent. This is why I can write.


I met this wannabe writer who wrote a management book and he wanted to branch out into fiction. I read his draft and I told him to stick to writing management books. And he had the knack to tell me he lack creativity. How can you write fiction without being creative?


Talent is inherent in all writers. They write because that is the only thing they can do. We write because the moment you put a pen/keyboard before us, we start fidgeting and all rile up. We want to express ourselves, we want to tell the world what we see in our minds eye. We are picky about words and sentences and prose and how someone would say something. We listen in on conversations at coffee shops and watch people go about life, taking notes of what's going on. We are loners and thinkers and philosophers and emotional wrecks (after a good movie) and all the while we want to write it down.


Talent is crucial to PERFECT writing. You either have it or not. I hate to bust your bubble but clearly, if your friends tell you your writing is like S*#T then please take up another hobby. Fishing or kite flying or planting roses. Anything else except writing a novel and thinking you'll make a million out of it. Honestly, I don;t write for the money. I write because all my life I knew I would write and I just want people to hear what I have to say.


Have a reality check and ask yourself whether you've got TALENT to write.

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The 3 things I hate about being a writer

I took a long time to get back into my writing groove. My 2nd book is way behind schedule, in fact there is no exact schedule for me to follow anymore. It went out the window sometime in March. Vacations, work and personal issues have grounded my writing momentum. So picking up the pace (so to speak) is akin to scaling Mount Everest on stilts.


So what do I hate about being a writer? As fulfilling as it is, there are somethings that make me wonder, why I ever bother writing a book? There's no turning back on my 2nd book, I've written 21 chapters and there is no way I will throw that in the waste-basket or in today's world relegate it to the hidden folder on my iBook.


Number 1: Writing is emotional.


You want your readers to feel what your characters are feeling. Right? So imagine writing a scene where your two characters are falling in love and you've just spent the evening chasing after your kids and wifey has a bone to pick with you over junior's school work. So in the end, your characters actually end up arguing and the plot just goes down hill from there. You blink hard and try to imagine the beauty of the scene when all you see is wifey's face holding up junior's homework.


Being in the right mood and right frame of mind is so hard...even in writing.


Number 2: How do you describe that?


Someone told me that my writing lack descriptive elements. My style is minimal, straight to the point and often times devoid of description. So shoot me! But there are times I want to describe the scene. "Show but don't tell". We hear that a lot but there are times when you hit a wall and you just wonder, "How do you describe that?". So I spend a good part of my writing hour just sitting there lost for words. Yes, even writers get lost for words. Worse still, you know the word but you just can't seem to recall it. It's at the tip of your tongue but it refuses to transfer itself to your word-processor. So you get stuck! Hate that.


Number 3: God! I lost the plot


You sit over coffee with some friends and they start talking about your book project. Ideas float around and wham! You get an idea to push your plot along. It's exciting, interesting, unique and darn unexpected. Your friends cheer you on, calling you a genius and show interest in reading your book. You go home all excited at your moment of inspiration, sit in front of your PC or notebook and...blank.


All the excitement has nothing to show for. I hate those moments. Really do. As a writer, I get so absent-minded because my mind is so muddled. You've got work issues, family issues and personal issues all crammed into a 6 pound mass of gray material we call a brain and something has to give.


So there you have it. The three (3) things I hate about being a writer. My list may be just these three (3) but what about yours?

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